Fuck Juice, I want Oatmeal

Due to our new obsession with oatmeal, my girlfriend visited Jamba Juice's website to see if their oatmeal is vegan. It is, kind of, don't get the brown sugar crumble on it, she tells me. 

Being the progressive company jamba juice is, they have installed a paint-esque feature on their website, so you can doodle on it. So as an act of reciprocation, Alyse scribbled "Fuck Juice, I want oatmeal!" all over their front page. 

She then told me that it was Jamba's new ad campaign. She almost got me, but something between the "Fuck Juice" part and the sloppy words tipped me off. 

Just for shits and giggles–  imagine how many more people would go to Jamba Juice if they used straight forward advertising instead of the crappy healthy morning campaign that they are using now. Answer: Lots and lots more. 

Hell, I would go buy the oatmeal, if after the cashier took my order she was forced (as a part of her job and the new marketing campaign) to scream out "Fuck Juice, this guy wants oatmeal!" And the other crew members would either clap, celebrate, or repeat after her.

It would make them millions.